Shock is a natural protective mechanism. It cushions us from the full force of our emotions in the early days, giving our minds and bodies time to process the reality of what’s happened. It’s your brain’s way of saying, “You’re not fully ready to comprehend the full extent of this yet.”
This can mean you feel numb or disconnected from the world around you, almost as though the loss hasn’t really happened. You might find yourself carrying on with routine tasks or experiencing a lack of emotion altogether. This doesn’t mean you aren’t grieving—it’s just the way your body and mind are coping in those initial days, months and for some it can be years.
What to Expect from Shock
The experience of shock can differ from person to person, but here are some common responses you might notice:
Emotional Numbness, a feeling of emptiness or detachment, where emotions seem distant or muted.
Disbelief or Denial, finding it hard to accept the reality of the loss or feeling as though it’s happening to someone else.
Physical Symptoms, headaches, muscle tension, or a heavy feeling in the chest are often linked with the body’s response to shock.
Memory Gaps, some people struggle to recall details or events surrounding the loss, as the brain temporarily shuts down non-essential processes.
This sense of shock can last anywhere from a few days to months, and it may come and go, especially as the reality of the loss sinks in.
Coping with Shock in Early Grief
Give Yourself Time.
There’s no rush to “feel” or process everything all at once. Shock can be an important part of adjusting to loss, so allow it to be there without forcing yourself to grieve in a particular way.
Don’t Judge Your Reactions
If you’re feeling numb or disconnected, it’s not a reflection of how much you care. Everyone responds to grief differently, and shock is one of the mind’s ways of protecting you.
Focus on Basic Needs
In the early days, focus on simple self-care—eating, resting, and trying to sleep. These may seem small, but they’re crucial for your wellbeing, especially while you navigate the physical effects of shock.
Talk to Someone
Whether it’s a friend, family member, or professional, sharing what you’re experiencing can help you process the shock. Even if you don’t feel ready to talk about your loss, having someone to lean on can offer support as you move through this phase.
Grief Support Can Help
Professional support can provide a safe space to explore your feelings at your own pace, whether you’re feeling numb, overwhelmed, or somewhere in between. Grief is unique for everyone, and having someone to help you navigate the early stages can make all the difference.
If you’re struggling with the shock of early grief and want support as you navigate this difficult time, email me on dipti@diptisolanki.com or book a free discovery call to see how I can help.
Together, we can explore ways to gently move through the early days of loss and begin the journey of healing.
